Cultural Tolerance For Divorce Continues to Rise

gall.jpgSeventy percent of Americans now believe that divorce is “morally acceptable,” according to a recent poll conducted by Gallup’s 2008 Values and Beliefs survey. This figure represents an 11 percent increase from just 7 years ago and a 5 percent increase from 1 year ago. Only 22 percent of Americans said they believed divorce was “morally wrong.” Interestingly, divorce was the only ethical issue of the 16 issues measured in the survey where opinions significantly changed over the past year. The survey was conducted by a telephone sampling of 1,017 adults in the US, aged 18 or older, from May 8-11, 2008.

Divorce Transition: What Happens To Our Friends Now?

dfriends.jpgTransition to one’s “new” life after the divorce can be stressful and difficult for many people. The level of that stress often is dependant upon the issues surrounding the divorce as well as the level of acrimony afterwards. Maintaining friends and keeping a support group is important psychologically for most people to help them move forward after the divorce. But, as many divorced individuals will tell you, this transitional process can be awkward and painful. If mutual friends of yours have gone through a divorce, you too know that post divorce interaction with each person can be a challenge.

If you are struggling with this situation, let me recommend that you take a minute to read an excellent article recently published in the Yuma Sun written by Bill Reed. Not only does he accurately capture much of the conflict involved, but he also includes insights from both the perspective of the divorced couple but also their friends. There are 13 “behavior rules” included that were suggested by Counselors Dee Ring Martz, Beth Lieberman and Robin Wall who share their professional advice to divorcing couples and their friends about how to maintain friendships through the transition.

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10 Ways to Alienate the Judge

no_phones.jpgJudges are particularly annoyed by lawyers (and their clients) who:

  • ignore the rules of court;
  • fail to prepare;
  • arrive late;
  • repeat themselves;
  • act rudely;
  • make frivolous arguments;
  • mislead the court;
  • argue with the judge;
  • refuse to talk settlement; and
  • request a last-minute continuance.

I can add a few from my own experience:

  • allow your cell phone to ring while in court;
  • dress inappropriately;
  • interrupt other people who are speaking;
  • chew gum while in court;
  • bring a baby or child to court; and
  • generally act belligerently without proper decorum.

Source: “Sure-Fire Ways to Alienate the Trial Judge”, Excerpted from Convincing the Judge: Practical Advice for Litigators , by Cecil C. Kuhne III

Be Sure to Pull Your Free Credit Report

creport.jpgAs part of the divorce proceedings, your attorney will at some point be trying to determine what credit card debts are in each of your individual names as well as shared accounts and authorized user accounts. Often times, understandably, clients are not sure. The distinction in the type of account is important, as it not only affects future liability on the account but also future reporting to the bureaus.

The liability for an individual account lies with the person whose name is on the account (presumably the person who opened it). A shared or co-debtor account allows the credit card company to go after either or both parties on the account. An authorized user situation creates a more complicated scenario. The credit card company cannot attempt to collect payments from a mere authorized user. Their recourse for collection is against the individual whose name is on the account so long as the authorized user did not sign the application or give their social security number to the credit card company. But it is important to know that the credit card companies will still report the payment history on both the individual owner and the authorized user to the credit bureaus. … Read More... “Be Sure to Pull Your Free Credit Report”

Vacationing Without the Kids? Don’t Leave Until You Have Prepared an Emergency Medical Authorization Form

med_form.jpgI typically receive several phone calls this time of year asking me if I have a generic Emergency Medical Authorization Form that parents can complete since they are headed out of town without the kids. This panicked call usually comes less than 24 hours before the departure time! It is very important to leave the caregiver this type of emergency authorization to be sure any necessary medical treatment will be provided to your child timely and without lots of “red tape” in your absence. So, to avoid those calls, I have attached my Emergency Medical Authorization Form to this article.  Download: .pdf | HTML

Try to relax and enjoy the time away from the kids. Happy travels!

… Read More... “Vacationing Without the Kids? Don’t Leave Until You Have Prepared an Emergency Medical Authorization Form”

Father’s Day Reflections, Including Freud and Tongue Biting

Father’s Day can be an extremely difficult one for many children. Unfortunately, thousands of children will not be with their father this Father’s Day due to many factors including divorce, death or service in the armed forces. As a result, many children don’t have the opportunity for a traditional Father’s Day.

I’d like to offer some thoughts about the importance of this day from the perspective of both a father and a practicing divorce lawyer for 30 years:

  1. Take the High Road. If it’s within your power to help a child spend some time or even talk with his or her father on Father’s Day, take the high road and make a special effort to make it happen. Across the country, thousands of children and fathers don’t have the opportunity to share their feelings with each other.
  2. Are You Too Busy to See Your Children? If you happen to be a father who lives with, or has access, to your children, realize how blessed you are to have children and don’t waste the opportunity to tell them how much you love them and how important they are to you! Thousands of fathers without such an opportunity would envy being in
… Read More... “Father’s Day Reflections, Including Freud and Tongue Biting”

If You Owe Back Support, Don’t Expect Your Stimulus Check

The IRS is treating the stimulus checks as if they were tax refunds. On their website, the IRS indicates that the amount of the stimulus check will be reduced or seized if :

  • You are single and your net income tax liability is less than $600. If you file Form 1040 net income tax liability is the amount shown on Line 57, plus the amount on Line 52.
  • You are married and your net income tax liability is less than $1,200.
  • You are single and your adjusted gross income (AGI) is more than $75,000. On Form 1040, AGI is the amount on Line 37.
  • You are married filing a joint return and your AGI is more than $150,000.
  • You owe back taxes that reduced your payment.
  • You have non-tax federal debts such as unpaid student loans or child-support obligations that reduced your payment.

If the IRS is reducing or seizing your stimulus check, they are supposed to mail you a letter of explanation.

So what do you do if you and your spouse have filed a joint return and your spouse owes back child support if you want to avoid having the IRS seize your share? Well, you may fall … Read More... “If You Owe Back Support, Don’t Expect Your Stimulus Check”

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