College Expenses And Divorce

Child’s College Expenses Problematic Upon Divorce. Why it’s Important To Say What You Mean and Mean What You Say

college expenses divorceWith the importance of higher education becoming more apparent every day, it is not uncommon for divorcing couples to decide to provide for their children’s college expenses. In Ohio, like many other states, domestic relations courts cannot ordera parent to pay these costs because the duty of support generally ends once a child reaches the age of 18 (or in some situations at 19) .  Nevertheless, the parties can negotiate a division of the college expenses and incorporate it into a separation agreement.

Generally speaking, a separation agreement is a contract and is therefore, binding on the parties involved.  So, if you decide to agree to be on the hook for your children’s college expenses upon divorce, it is extremely important that the language within your agreement clearly expresses your intent.

In many cases, the children of these divorcing couples have yet to reach the age of 18.  Therefore, these provisions providing for college expenses are quite often a future occurrence not set to happen for years after the divorce is final.  This can obviously produce many problems.… Read More... “College Expenses And Divorce”

Uncoupling and Divorce

What is Uncoupling and How Does It Relate To Or Not Relate To Divorce?

uncoupling divorceA few years ago when Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin announced they were “consciously uncoupling”, many rolled their eyes at what felt like pretentious language.

While “uncoupling” sounds a little strange, in truth, it may be a more precise way to describe the demise of a marriage and the subsequent unraveling of intertwined lives, then just saying “we are getting divorced.” Divorce is a legal process that culminates with a bang of a gavel. Uncoupling is the emotional process of ending the marital/romantic relationship. It extends far beyond mere legalities.

Unlike divorce that clearly defines the practical division of financial assets and legal responsibilities, uncoupling rarely has clear boundaries or a definite end. Especially when there are children; the relationship doesn’t end so much as morph into another kind of relationship.

Do not assume “Relationship” always refers to one of civility; while that is the ideal, in truth many couples continue their post marital relationship by bickering, fighting and power struggles. These adversarial marriages, while legally over, are not really uncoupled; there is simply too much energy (albeit negative energy) that goes into keeping a … Read More... “Uncoupling and Divorce”

Divorce In Another Place: A Quick And Painless Divorce

Looking to Divorce Somewhere Other Than Where You Live? Why You May Want to Reconsider

divorce destination ohioIn a previous article written on July 25, 2015, titled, “Divorce: DivorceHotel Provides Vacation And A Divorce“, I discussed the U.S.’s first “divorce hotel” in Saratoga Springs, NY which offers a weekend retreat where a couple can indulge in fine dining and relaxing spa treatments, all while their divorce is being finalized.

Headed by Netherlands-based company, DivorceHotel, the newest trend in separations is to offer a “destination divorce” where couples can vacation and end their marriage simultaneously.  While the idea may seem appealing at first glance, several factors should be carefully considered before you decide to pack your bags.

Getting a divorce in a place other than where you live is nothing new.  For years, people have been traveling outside of their home state to take advantage of “quickie divorce” policies in other locations. In the past, some couples headed to Nevada, while others went a bit further traveling to countries such as Mexico and the Dominican Republic to take advantage of the fast and inexpensive divorce options offered.  Quick and painless, for many the process seemed like a no-brainer.

However, today the … Read More... “Divorce In Another Place: A Quick And Painless Divorce”

Divorce: DivorceHotel Provides Vacation And A Divorce

DivorceHotel – A Relaxing Getaway to Get Away from Being Married! Hotel Resort Provides Quickie Divorce Package

divorce DivorceHotelIn September 2014, a luxurious resort in upstate New York became the first hotel in the United States in which you can check in married on Friday, and check out single on Sunday! The Gideon Putnam Hotel in Saratoga Springs has paired with Netherlands-based company, DivorceHotel, and is now officially catering to the needs of those looking for a vacation and a divorce all at the same time.

While this is a somewhat novel concept for the U.S., hotels across Europe have been providing hundreds of “quickie divorces” to couples since 2012.  DivorceHotel, seeks to offer a friendlier and more affordable separation process compared to the typical contentious and lengthy litigation proceedings that usually accompany a divorce.

The divorce package costs anywhere from $5000 to approximately $12000 and includes 2 separate rooms (however the couple can stay together if they so choose), an attorney for each spouse and a mediator who works with the couple at the hotel. Upon arrival, the spouses are greeted with a “welcome package” complete with information booklets, sparkling water, red wine and dark chocolates. The biggest … Read More... “Divorce: DivorceHotel Provides Vacation And A Divorce”

Divorce: Summer Holidays for Those Newly Divorced

The Struggle Of Divorce During the Summer Holidays – How To Juggle The Roles And Responsibilities In Your Life

divorce summer holidaysMemorial Day, Labor Day and 4th of July are holidays that celebrate different aspects of American culture. Memorial Day honors those who fought to defend our principles and ideals, Labor Day honors our work ethic, and 4th of July honors our fight for independence. We don’t consider them “big holidays.” They are, for most of us, times to be outdoors, watch some fireworks, and eat lots of good food. They also give us an extended weekend.

For a newly divorced person, however, these holidays can take on great significance. You, too, have been fighting for your principles, working hard, and struggling with your newfound independence. No three holidays in our calendar reflect your struggle as these three do. Since we do not have a specific holiday that honors those who have been through the struggle of divorce, adopt these as your three days. Memorial Day honors your fight to preserve your ideals and principles. Labor Day represents your struggle to juggle all the roles and responsibilities in your life, and the 4th of July, like divorce, is about freedom and … Read More... “Divorce: Summer Holidays for Those Newly Divorced”

Social Media In Divorce – Prenuptial Agreement Provision

Avoid Post Divorce Disputes – Don’t Forget To Include Social Media Clause in Your Prenuptial Agreement!

social media divorce prenuptial agreementIn the past, we’ve written multiple articles relating to social media. I have linked to some of them at the end of this article.  Now, I would like to focus on an issue that may evolve during a marriage and can expand exponentially after a divorce; social media disputes between couples. This type of ugly dispute has led many in the legal world to conclude that some couples need a “social media clause” in their prenuptial agreement (s).

If you’re connected to the world via social media, you’ve seen this happen.  Let’s say a mid-30’s married couple has a nasty fallout ending in a divorce.  You’re friends with both of these individuals on Facebook, follow them on Twitter, and maybe follow them on Instagram as well.  After their divorce, things get even nastier.  Now, instead of fighting amongst themselves in private and attempting to resolve issues, they’re broadcasting these “differences” on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram.  These problems can be about anything, even complaining about child splitting time, each other’s parenting skills, or even extending into alimony or child support.

In … Read More... “Social Media In Divorce – Prenuptial Agreement Provision”

Narcissist Spouse In A Divorce – Steps To Recovery

A Book Review of “Will I Ever Be Free of You? – How to Navigate a High-Conflict Divorce from a Narcissist and Heal Your Family”, Written by Karyl McBride, Ph.D.

Last week we posted an article written by child psychologist, Dr. Gregory Ramey, “Narcissism: Is it all about you? ”  I thought posting it back-to-back with this book review would emphasize the troubling aspects of narcissist personality traits from the varying perspectives of two (2) psychologists.  Publisher’s Note – R. Mues

narcissist divorceNarcissism is defined as a personality disorder that goes beyond mere selfishness and vanity.  It is a prevalent cause of marital and family problems.  Narcissists do not have the capacity to love, understand other persons’ emotions, or feel empathy toward others.  They are grandiose in their need for praise and attention; they overestimate their abilities; and, they diminish persons around them with emotional abuse.

The term “narcissism” comes from the Greek myth of Narcissus, a handsome young man who fell in love with his own reflection in a pool of water.  But, when he reached out to touch his reflection in the water, he shattered the reflection.  He became so self-absorbed with himself that he lost all interest … Read More... “Narcissist Spouse In A Divorce – Steps To Recovery”

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