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Blast From The Past: Post-Divorce: Here Are Three Ways to Declutter Negative Thoughts After Recent Divorce. Is it Time for Some Spring Cleaning for Your Mind?

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Declutter Negative Thoughts After Divorce

PUBLISHERS NOTE: Here is one of my favorites posts from back on March 14th, 2022! We have a ton of interesting articles in our archives of the Ohio Family Law Blog. Use our Search tool and enjoy a few oldie but goodies!

Spring Cleaning for the Mind? How to Declutter Negative Thoughts After Divorce

The sight of blooming flower blossoms always prompts the itch to spring clean. While we may toss out our junk, scrub the floors, and dust the furniture, we often don’t take the time to declutter the negative thoughts that intrude in our minds daily. This is especially true for recently divorced individuals, who often experience loneliness, anxiety, guilt, and grief.

Here are three ways to declutter those negative thoughts just in time to welcome the change of the seasons!

Engage in Self-Care

Self-care is perhaps one of the easiest ways to start decluttering negative thoughts after a divorce. We hear often about doing self-care, but what exactly is self-care?

Self-care is generally defined as doing anything to improve one’s mental health. This can be done in a variety of ways. It can be as simple as reading a book for

Tips to Reduce The “Shell-Shocked” Phase After a Divorce!

The Various Stages of Post-Divorce Transition…Once The Initial Shock Wears Off

I have been doing some reading lately regarding the various stages of post-divorce transition folks go through to compare it with what I have seen as a divorce lawyer over the past 40+ years. The various “expert’s” articles that I have read seem to confirm many of my personal observations.

Generally there are 5 to 7 different phases that psychologists have identified. Just like grief moves through different stages, so do divorced individuals. Like with grief, the stages vary with each person as does the length of each phase. This is understandable since often it is just one party that wants out of the marriage.

In a well-written article by Robert Taibbi, LCSW, posted in Psychology Today on March 11, 2023, titled 6 Stages of Separation or Divorce, the author clearly lays out the various stages of life during and after a divorce. He states that “once the initial shock wears off, many feel shell-shocked for many weeks. It takes about 6-12 months to feel more grounded”. Click here to read this article.

Beware the Calm Before the Stormy 7 Stages of Divorce

Dr. Jamie C. Williamson, … Read More... “Tips to Reduce The “Shell-Shocked” Phase After a Divorce!”

How To Forgive And Let Go After Divorce

How can I forgive and let go after divorce? The difficult challenges of healing post-divorce

No matter how you look at it, divorce is painful. Your life (and the lives of your children) are changed forever. And for a time you must face challenge after challenge – a seemingly endless stream of them. Yet you know you must continue to move forward so you persevere and eventually ask yourself the question, “How can I forgive and let go of all the hurt?”

This question is important because it’s at the core of all the pain you’re experiencing over your divorce. It’s also one of the most difficult challenges of healing after divorce because divorce brings with it so many hurts, betrayals, and lost dreams.

So let me walk you through how I help my clients learn how to forgive and let go after divorce.

The first step is to truly understand what forgiveness is.

What is forgiveness?

Simply put, forgiveness is a conscious decision to release your feelings of resentment, hurt, anger, or vengeance toward a person or group who has harmed you.

What I like about this definition is that it’s all about you. It’s not about waiting … Read More... “How To Forgive And Let Go After Divorce”

How To Be Happy With Your Life Post-Divorce

Are You Happy With Your Post-Divorce Life

How To Steer Your Mindset In The Direction Of Happiness, Post-Divorce

Are you one of those people who just knows how to be happy with your life, regardless of your circumstances? Or do your circumstances dictate the state of your happiness? What if you’re divorced or are going through a divorce? Would happiness suddenly seem like a coveted but impossible commodity?

There are no right or wrong answers – only honest ones. It’s the honest ones, after all, that open the door to possibility, whether that be in the form of major improvement or a simple shift in perspective.

Using divorce as a pivotal discussion point is a meaningful way to examine the concept of happiness in the throes of chaos, disappointment, and loss. As a veritable 180 to the hope-filled expectations and joyful ambitions of married life, divorce is an eviscerating experience.

Unexpected “identity crisis”: Now Who Are You?

It turns your life inside out, making it all but unrecognizable for what can be a very long adjustment period.

It also messes with your sense of personal identity: You are used to living the role of a spouse, and suddenly that … Read More... “How To Be Happy With Your Life Post-Divorce”

Here are Some of the Worst Things that You Can Do After a Divorce!

Important “Don’t Dos” Post-Divorce Checklist Could Be Crucial In Healing From Painful Divorce Proceedings

Should you use a Post-Divorce Checklist? How about Tips to Avoid!

Typically going through a divorce is a “bad” experience. Often times these are very long painful proceedings. A couple of years ago I posted a blog article titled “A Post-Divorce Checklist“. Here is a link to that article. Below is the flip-side to that post!

Here are 8 “Don’t Dos Post-Divorce.”

DON’T EXPECT YOUR EX TO BE REASONABLE

If your Ex was not reasonable during the divorce, it is likely that his/her “reasonableness” level won’t have changed after the divorce is finalized! So, that means to plan accordingly. Try to plan way ahead so you can get your divorce lawyer involved if necessary. But always do your best to maintain a positive relationship with your Ex after the divorce.
DON’T TRY TO GET EVEN WITH YOUR EX

No matter how miserably you were treated during your marriage, never try to retaliate after the case is over! It likely will come back to bite you! I can share many many stories of former clients who thought that when the case was over that they

What To Do If Your Life Is A Mess After Divorce

Mess After Divorce: It’s possible for you to love your life again.

It’s a tricky, devious, exhausting struggle, this whole getting-over-a-relationship thing. And if you have been married, you know there is a lot more at stake than just a romantic hit-and-run. Marriage means you were vested in something bigger than just “two people in love.” So, if your life is a mess after divorce, it’s no wonder.

Think about what it’s like to pack up and move from a house you have lived in for 10, 20, 30 years. Now imagine the task as an effort to downsize.

Everything that was once neatly in its place (on cleaning day, anyway) is now…well…everywhere. Essentials, non-essentials, mementos, family heirlooms, favorites-for-no-good-reason. It’s all unearthed, waiting for a decision to be made on its destiny.

Your home is a mess. Your life is a mess. After divorce, this metaphor comes to life in every area of your existence. You don’t feel as if you are “just moving” (or that they are just moving) — you feel as if you have been foreclosed on.

Mess After Divorce: You have to move out of and move into. You have to divide, negotiate, relinquish.

Post-Divorce: Here Are Three Ways to Declutter Negative Thoughts After Recent Divorce. Is it Time for Some Spring Cleaning for Your Mind?

Spring Cleaning for the Mind? How to Declutter Negative Thoughts After Divorce

Here are three ways to declutter those negative thoughts just in time to welcome the change of the seasons!

Engage in Self-Care

Self-care is perhaps one of the easiest ways to start decluttering negative thoughts after a divorce. We hear often about doing self-care, but what exactly is self-care?

Self-care is generally defined as doing anything to improve one’s mental health. This can be done in a variety of ways. It can be as simple as reading a book for an hour, or as complicated as planning a trip to Europe! Going on a daily walk, starting a new hobby, journaling, or even volunteering are examples.

Doing something for yourself as you navigate this new life post-divorce, can help ground you and declutter those negative thoughts. While

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